It took a while before I thought I could say ‘hello world!’ For a long time now I have cocooned myself. Trying to find a safe place to just be. I look back and see how I truly was in a robotic state, no matter how hard I tried to continue to be a mother and a partner, a worker and a friend. Very few asked what was happening to me. Maybe I told myself I was successful in hiding what was going on. But the sleepless nights, the tears that never seemed to stop; the thoughts that continually went through my head told the truth. I was present in a physical sense and did what was necessary, but I felt I was dying inside. It felt like I too was locked up. Would this feeling ever end? (more…)
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